.Friday, November 30, 2007 ' 1:39 PM Y
& I'm waiting
thought of unlocking my blog.
but i think i dun wan it anymore.
i dun wan her to find it again and read it.
cos i found her blog after seeing alien(this is so tt she doesnt search and find)'s post.
okay, i seriously dunno wad to start from again.
i wanted to post the pics i took ytd.
talk about ytd the nice nice day first.
Thursday, 29 Nov 2007went to clementi in tt early morning.
asked a stupid ques kayy.
asked whether can wear home clothes or not.
lol, dunno why i asked tt lahh.
okay, so we had lots of ufn at west coast kayY! :D
Cheryl's mum is so damn nice! xD
except for the fact tt she drives very slow.
and i got dizzy in her car.
but maybe i was just tired . xD
cant be bothered to upload the pics le.
cos only alien is reading.
and then other ppl also cannot see the pic.
i <3 BRAVO kay.
we seriously rox! <3
x)
GO BRAVO~
MUST BEAT OTHER GROUPS KAY.
THEY SAY WE SERIOUSLY HAS A HIGH CHANCE OF WINNING.
SO WE MUST MAKE IT A FACT KAYY!.
MUST BEAT DEXTEROUS AND SHOW HER TT.
<3 Cheryl, Mel, Huili, Junwei, Ai Ying.
We spent the rest of the day together!
WITHOUT ANY BOYS! xD
Walked all the way from one end to the other end of the park.
cos Cheryl say got this dog run place.
then maybe can see dogs.
then we just anything anything walk walk lorh.
anyways, just after lunch mahh.
go walk walk also good.
then we walk all the way.
so long can -.-
then reach there see the map.
then realise actually we walked all the way to the end.
worst still, u know wad?
THE DOG RUN PLACE WAS CLOSED.
LOL.
so in the end we walked back :X
then sang cheers on the way there and back. x)
and they started playing with a pong pong fruit can.
kick here kick there.
they trying to break the pong pong loll.
but in the end hor, all the juice/water coming out.
then Cheryl keep throwing the thing up on to the tree.
or rather on the tree.
to break it.
and Mel spotted this beehive on tt tree!
LOL.
then all of them started running over.
Cheryl threw the thing over the beehive then the fruit came down.
so heng can xD
then they all scream and start running over.
me and junwei playing wif tt fake fake bicycle on the ground. :X
so funny.
then they started running towards us.
we quite far from them lahh.
cant stop laughing X:
then we all run to the underpass there xD
haha, then slowly walk back.
then we started marching.
cos nobody there mahh.
not even a soul.
only at random times the officer-on-duty cycle here and there.
and the ppl cutting the grass lah..
haha, our marching very guai can.
cos they timing like suddenly fast suddenly slow.
xD
end up we all luan diao.
but in the end still walk back to mac.
sit there.
and we discussed performance!
then wait wait wait.
then sir came! xD
chatted wif him a while.
then we went outside the playground play.
we climbed the pyramid/spider web thingy!
EVEN SIR DID.
SIR AND CHERYL CLIMBED RIGHT UP TO THE TOP.
ME, JUNWEI, HUILI STOPPED HALFWAY.
Aiying went home alr, then Mel cannot play, cos she fell down ytd.
then got a few wounds.
get well soon kay ((:
haha. then Cheryl and Sir hor.
each person sit one side.
then back to back.
look like wad can xDD
then me and huili and junwei playing sand again.
then they climbed down.
Sir came over and asked wad we doing.
then huili one two..
(we wanted to throw sand xDD)
but Sir ran away. -.-
he went look for Mel.
can see he biased towards her lahh.
nvm lahh. (:
then cheryl went back soon after too.
the three of us started burying our feets inside the sand again.
haha. then after tt started raining.
then we went back to mac.
talk and talk
then around 8.
Cheryl's Mum came.
drove us to YewTee mrt cos they live in yewtee.
then Sir stayed at mac, dunno why :X
so huili stopped at yishun.
me and mel went back toa payoh.
mel is nice de i agree for tt.
went home. so tired.
then went online.
find bear bear(SHE"S BACK <333), alien, and SHERLYN SAINT TAN XDD
after tt slept.
Friday, 31 Nov 2007haii.
read her blog.
seriously dunno where to start from.
she wrotes lots of bad things.
and lots of vulgarites about me.
suan le.
i dun wanna care anymore.
thought tt she xiang tong le.
then wrote me tt letter.
i wrote her one too.
but forgot to gave her.
like two weeks or so le.
felt very bad towards her.
i do know tt i hurted her.
and i must say.
even though she wun be reading this.
I'VE KNOWN YOU FOR SIX YEARS.
YES.
U SAID SO TOO,
SIX YEARS.
BUT ONLY TILL SEC 1.
I REALLY START TO KNOW U.
IN PRI SCH,
I DUN REALLY EVEN TALK TO U MUCH.
SO U CANT BLAME ME FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING U.
BECOS IM REALLY JUST LIKE A NEW FREN TO U.
U CAN SAY SO.
AND I KNOW MEL IS MUCH NICER THAN ME.
TO U.
BUT I HAVE TO SAY.
U KEEP SAYING I DUN UNDERSTAND U.
MAYBE I REALLY DUN.
BUT IF U'RE WORKING TT KIND NO TIME THEN CAN DUN GO JOB.
WHAT ARE U SO STRESSED UP ABOUT IT?
NO TIME THEN DUN GO LAH!
AND I DUN UNDERSTAND U,
IS BECOS.
ALL OF US ARE DIFFERENT INDIVIDUALS.
I'VE BEEN TRYING HARD NOWADAYS
NOT TO HURT U.
AND U SAID SO TOO,
U'RE TRYING NOT TO HURT US TOO.
EVERYTHING SEEMS FINE NOW ON THE OUTSIDE.
BUT IT SEEMS SO DAMN CHAOTIC ON THE INSIDE.
U CAN SAY IM RELAXING.
PLAYING GAMES.
YESH,
BUT IT'S UR CHOICE TO GO AND WORK.
AND DUN THINK I DUN FEEL BAD IM USING SO MUCH OF MY MUM'S MONEY OR SO.
BECOS I DO.
AND I DO WAN TO WORK,
BUT I CANT FIND ANY JOB.
WANTED TO GO WORK IN THE PLACE MY MUM WORKED AT.
BUT THEY DUN RECRUIT 13 YEARS OLD DE REN.
I MAY SEEM REALLY BAD TO U.
BUT IN THE PAST.
U TOLD LCBS.
THAT.
I DUN CARE ABOUT U.
AND I NEVER ASK WHETHER U'RE OKAY.
TT TIME WHEN U'RE HURT.
EVEN THOUGH I'VE KNOWN U FOR SIX YEARS.
BUT THINK AGAIN?
DID I REALLY NEVER ASK U?
AND TT TIME,
I DIDNT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT TT TOO.
U SAY I DUN UNDERSTAND UR STRESS AND SO ON.
I CAN SAY I REALLY DUN.
AND ON TT PARTICULAR DAY.
U CRIED IN FRONT OF SENIORS.
THE REASON WHY I WROTE IN MY BLOG WHICH I CHANGED URL.
TT U ARE TRYING TO GET SYMPATHY OR STH.
IS BECOS I CANNOT STAND IT.
AND I TRIED MY BEST TO HOLD EVERYTHING TT DAY.
DIDNT WANT TO GO DISTURB U.
COS I REALLY DUN UNDERSTAND.
AND I DUNNO WAD TO SAY.
I HATE MYSELF FOR TT.
FOR NOT KNOWING HOW TO COMFORT PPL
AND UNDERSTAND PPL, ESP U.
COS TO ME,
AFTER I READ UR LETTER.
I REALLY FELT TT U'VE BECOME PART OF MY LIFE.
STH TT I REALLY WANT TO HOLD ON TO.
STH TT I DUN WAN TO LOSE.
AND I CAN SAY TOO,
AFTER SO LONG,
U DONT UNDERSTAND ME AS WELL.
BECOS IF U'RE STILL WRITING TT IN UR BLOG ABOUT ME.
I CAN TELL U.
U DUN UNDERSTAND ME TOO.
AND THE REASON NOW IM LETTING ALIEN TO READ MY BLOG IS TT.
I WANT A LIL TRUST BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.
COS I FEEL TT I NEGLECTED HER DURING THIS YEAR.
AND SHE DO UNDERSTAND ME ALOT.
TT'S LIFE.
PPL UNDERSTAND OTHER PPL.
MAYBE WE ARE JUST NOT FATED TO BE GOOD FRENS.
OR SO.
BUT I'LL TRY MY BEST.
AND SO WOULD U.
JUST LIKE U HAD SAID SO.
AND IF U DUN BUY GIFTS FOR US.
DO WE MIND?
HAVE WE SAID TT WE MIND?
IN PRI SCH.
ALOT OF US DUN BUY GIFTS FOR EACH OTHER.
U SENT ME A SMS 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY'
IM ALR THANKFUL FOR IT.
U WISH ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY RIGHT IN MY FACE.
IM TAHNKFUL OF IT TOO.
AT LEAST THERE'S THE EFFORT.
AND U DUNNO WAD STRESS I HAVE TOO.
BECOS U DUN PLAY ONLINE GAMES LIKE ME.
IT'S NOT JUST FOR THE SAKE OF RELAXING.
U LEARN ABOUT FRENSHIP AND STUFF IN GAMES.
U LEARN FROM OTHER PLAYERS
THOSE U HAVE NEVER KNOWN THEM B4.
TT MAKES U A CHANGED PERSON.
AND I CAN TELL U FRANKLY.
AUDI IS FULL OF COUPLES AND STUFF.
AND I DO HAVE A COUPLE.
AND DEEP DOWN INSIDE MY HEART.
I CAN SAY I DO LOVE HIM.
NOT TT KIND OF PLAY PLAY LOVE.
IS REAL LOVE.
STH TT U MIGHT NOT HAVE EXPERIENCED B4.
AND FOR TT, U DUN UNDERSTAND.
AND WHEN SOMEBODY BREAKS WIF U.
IT'S ONE DEVASTATING ONE.
TT U DUN UNDERSTAND TOO.
ONE HAS IT'S OWN STRESS TOO.
SOMETIMES,
I RATHER I PLAY AUDI.
THEN TALK TO PPL I KNOW.
COS IN AUDI,
THOSE GOOD FRENS I HAVE DUNNO ME IN REAL LIFE.
THEY ACCOMPANY ME.
AND MAKE ME FELE HAPPIER AND SUCH.
AND TO ME AND MY LIFE,
TT'S WAD THESE GAMES ARE FOR.
IT'S NOT JUST ONLY FOR RELAXATION.
AND EVEN LCBS SAID SO.
EMO IS NOT GOOD.
THEN TRY NOT TO EMO.
U TOLD ME TT U WUN.
BUT IF U'RE SUCH AN EMO PERSON.
THINK ABOUT THE HAPPY THINGS.
IT WILL REALLY HELP MUCH BETTER.
AND DUN DWELL SO MUCH ON THOSE SAD THINGS.
IT NEVER HELPS I CAN TELL U.
AND THIS IS WAD I LEARN FROM GAMES.
I LEARN TO BE OPTIMISTIC AND LOOK FURTHER.
I LEARN TO BECOME A HAPPIER PERSON TO MAKE OTHER PPL HAPPY.
TO CHEER UP THEIR DAY.
BUT ONE THING I NEVER COULD LEARN.
IS TT I CANNOT COMFORT PPL.
FOR SOME REASON.
I DUNNO, MAYBE IM TOO SHY OR WAD.
IM JUST AFRAID TT I MAKE PPL MORE SAD.
AND I DUN WAN TT TO HAPPEN.
BUT I PROMISE MYSELF, FOR MY SAKE, UR SAKE, AND EVERYBODY'S SAKE.
TT I'LL TRY.
IF U REALLY DUN LIKE ME TT MUCH,
I COULD HAVE JUST LEAVE NY U KNOW.
BUT IT HAS BEEN MY DREAM.
BECOS MY DAD KEEP STRESSING ME TO STUDY.
BECOS HE WANTS ME TO DO WELL.
HE HAS HIGH EXPECTATIONS ON ME.
AND I DUN WAN TO DISAPPOINT HIM.
BECOS MY BRO HAS BEEN DOING SO.
BUT BECOS OF MY BRO, I'VE NOT BEEN DOING WORK.
I WANNA TRY MY BEST NOW.
IM LEARNING FROM U.
TO WORK HARD.
I DUN WANNA DISAPPOINT ANYBODY ANYMORE.
NOW U'RE NOT WRONG.
AND U DUN HAVE TO MAKE UP FOR IT ANYMORE.
IM DOING IT NOW.
AND JUST ONE LAST SENTENCE.
WHY DO U REGRET FORGIVING ME AFTER U HAD DID TT?
think again.