昨天和老师聊了一下，过后也和朋友谈天。
抛开流泪不止，这一下又让我陷进思考未来的漩涡里，这是我逃避了几个月决定不想的事，是我诚心承认我找不到解决方法的事。也许就像我常劝人家说的，“事情也许没像你想象中的那么糟糕、严重”，回想起来，也许它真的不怎么样，不值得我哭了那几公升的眼泪，但说到自己的未来，这能不严重吗？我根本不懂得怎么去面对自己的无助。接下来的心情也有够忐忑的，一直和朋友出去（是在麻醉自己吗？），但静下来的时候、一个人的时候， 还是掩不住自己低沉的心情，想也不是，不想也不是，到底该怎么办！
再说，我真的能好好努力、读书吗？在想这事情的时候，我却在网上看视频。

今天出门帮朋友庆祝生日，我们没计划，最后跑到游戏场去玩。
和朋友联手玩投篮机，投了五百多分 （我们没那么厉害，是小型的投篮机，所以挺容易），流了很多汗，觉得自己好像很久没这种感觉。回家途中，还是陷入了沉思，忽然间有这感触。
在那六十秒内，你能付出多少努力来投多少球？
在你投出去的球中，又有多少球能顺利地投进？
在你顺利投进的球，又是否能顺利让你通过到达下一关？
而在你游戏结束时，你又能得到多少成绩？
这一切就如人生一样，我们能坚持多少、付出多少努力？但努力后，却要靠运气与机会让我们顺利过关，面对下一个挑战。而一切结束后，我们又作出了多少成绩？

如果说我承认我害怕这一切，我就能顺利逃避吗？
很无奈的告诉自己，这绝对是不可能。
踢到铁板，就狠狠地给他踢下去吧！
想这么多是何苦呢？

THAT LADYY

` Luping
` Amethyst (Ame)
` 22

` 6H'06 FTPPS
` 104'07 204'08 302'09 402'10 NYGH
` 11S6A HCJC
` NTU

`ELF, Primadonna, F迷, JM and much more

used to be:
` Audi-addict; IcyWitchy/IcyIceWitchy/
---xAMETHYST / Amethystf
` FAM: TheRetainners; -PlayWithMe- ; xLOVEDOPESSx;


Luping is a lost child that has been seeking for her career direction since the first time someone asked her "What would you like to be when you grow up?", when she was still too tiny to reach the basin in her house. Despite reading books like What Should I Do with My Life: The True Story of People Who Answered the Ultimate Question by Po Bronson, she had been searching like a headless housefly (literally translated from 无头苍蝇) past graduation when she actually probably needed to find a job. Eventually, she found a job and a... direction.

For those who know Luping personally, she loves plushies/soft toys and is prepared to go on war with anyone who gets their hands on her babies. Her babies are personified with voices of hers and her Mummy's, and both of them enjoy framing the babies for things they obviously cannot do. When her Mummy suggested that if one day, the babies actually speak up, “那应该会吓死” (it would probably frighten one to death), she responded that she will instead “开心死” (be happy till death) if xiaofenhong (our cute, hot pink, flat bunny) replies her. That is the extent of her loneliness love for her babies.

And for those who know Luping as Amethyst, she is a rather huge fangirl of the Korean boy band, Super Junior. So much that she learnt (and is still learning - 반가워요!) Korean in hope of understanding what they say without subtitles and avoiding the losses in translation. She has been a fanfic writer for two years and counting, which sparked off her interest in writing and thus, this blog to practise writing so that one day, she might have the courage to apply for a (content) writer position or send in a manuscript to a publisher.

HER PASTY

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