.Sunday, January 19, 2014 ' 2:28 PM Y
& I'm waiting
好累。
有些人在长大的过程中变了一个人。
那相处的感觉.. 早已不一样。
该怎样对待这些人..
最近发现, 我不知不觉地疏远他们。
但你。为什么从头到尾那么一致。
那该死的缺乏安全感难道就不能离你远一点吗? 虽然这次是能理解的。好希望好希望能有更多更多人能守护你, 支持你, 让你得到全世界的认同与掌声。
曾让自己满足的东西，过了一阵子，便会变得不满足……
人的欲望无限，真希望你能快乐。
“没什么话能表达我的心情，
就……夏之雪台湾公演结束了。
我…真的…正去往何方?
理解我的人…
何时能得到安定?
做了最后一场演出，
现在，这个让我满足了好一阵子的公演…
畅快吗？幸福吗？”
开学才第一星期，就觉得好累。心理上的累，身体上的累。
与人相处累。与自己相处更累。
真希望能回到从前，能不用想而单单地感受。
过于的清楚自己的想法和感受，变成了一种想着该怎样感受的习惯。
这习惯，让我思绪好乱。
是伤心？还是觉得我现在应该伤心？还是我想让别人知道我伤心？
虚假。好像一切包括自己都变得好虚假。
而想要疯狂的追逐自己想达到的，是否是一个明智的决定？
不，那不是决定，是一种选择。因为在半途中，我总是会选择放弃。
至少… 你们的笑容能让我暂时忘掉自己的烦恼，不需要思考的微笑与感受那份快乐。
逃避吗？也许吧，但我逃得很快乐。
突然想起那在台湾寄给几位好友的明信片…
许愿竹上写着 “我们可以很幸福”。
就抱着这个信念吧，我们要一起幸福。
THAT LADYY
` Luping
` Amethyst (Ame)
` 22
` 6H'06 FTPPS
` 104'07 204'08 302'09 402'10 NYGH
` 11S6A HCJC
` NTU
`ELF, Primadonna, F迷, JM and much more
used to be:
` Audi-addict; IcyWitchy/IcyIceWitchy/
---xAMETHYST / Amethystf
` FAM: TheRetainners; -PlayWithMe- ; xLOVEDOPESSx;
Luping is a lost child that has been seeking for her career direction since the first time someone asked her "What would you like to be when you grow up?", when she was still too tiny to reach the basin in her house. Despite reading books like What Should I Do with My Life: The True Story of People Who Answered the Ultimate Question by Po Bronson, she had been searching like a headless housefly (literally translated from 无头苍蝇) past graduation when she actually probably needed to find a job. Eventually, she found a job and a... direction.
For those who know Luping personally, she loves plushies/soft toys and is prepared to go on war with anyone who gets their hands on her babies. Her babies are personified with voices of hers and her Mummy's, and both of them enjoy framing the babies for things they obviously cannot do. When her Mummy suggested that if one day, the babies actually speak up, “那应该会吓死” (it would probably frighten one to death), she responded that she will instead “开心死” (be happy till death) if xiaofenhong (our cute, hot pink, flat bunny) replies her. That is the extent of her loneliness love for her babies.
And for those who know Luping as Amethyst, she is a rather huge fangirl of the Korean boy band, Super Junior. So much that she learnt (and is still learning - 반가워요!) Korean in hope of understanding what they say without subtitles and avoiding the losses in translation. She has been a fanfic writer for two years and counting, which sparked off her interest in writing and thus, this blog to practise writing so that one day, she might have the courage to apply for a (content) writer position or send in a manuscript to a publisher.
HER PASTY
