It's so hard.

I don't know how I can actually get myself down to studying properly.
This is not working.
Nothing is working.
Am I even trying?
How am I going to get the results I want like this?

Stop being so sick and tired of being sick and tired you idiot.
It's not going to get you anywhere.

And get over this matter.
Yes, it sucks to be accused or whatever.
And yes, the self-righteous part of you is saying, seriously, I did nothing wrong.
But you knew better when you started it.

And yes, forever lonely as a fangirl.
But complaining of the loneliness and wallowing in self-pity is not going to help with anything.

fucking just get over it.
And get to studying.

you don't have a second chance with exams.
and you can do whatever you like after the exams.

while people are struggling for their lives elsewhere, crying over lost ones, you're here playing.
make your life more meaningful.
be responsible.
like you always hoped yourself to be.

and work as hard as him.
not for him, but for yourself and the people you love.
your life is more than just fangirling and everything related to that.

THAT LADYY

` Luping
` Amethyst (Ame)
` 22

` 6H'06 FTPPS
` 104'07 204'08 302'09 402'10 NYGH
` 11S6A HCJC
` NTU

`ELF, Primadonna, F迷, JM and much more

used to be:
` Audi-addict; IcyWitchy/IcyIceWitchy/
---xAMETHYST / Amethystf
` FAM: TheRetainners; -PlayWithMe- ; xLOVEDOPESSx;


Luping is a lost child that has been seeking for her career direction since the first time someone asked her "What would you like to be when you grow up?", when she was still too tiny to reach the basin in her house. Despite reading books like What Should I Do with My Life: The True Story of People Who Answered the Ultimate Question by Po Bronson, she had been searching like a headless housefly (literally translated from 无头苍蝇) past graduation when she actually probably needed to find a job. Eventually, she found a job and a... direction.

For those who know Luping personally, she loves plushies/soft toys and is prepared to go on war with anyone who gets their hands on her babies. Her babies are personified with voices of hers and her Mummy's, and both of them enjoy framing the babies for things they obviously cannot do. When her Mummy suggested that if one day, the babies actually speak up, “那应该会吓死” (it would probably frighten one to death), she responded that she will instead “开心死” (be happy till death) if xiaofenhong (our cute, hot pink, flat bunny) replies her. That is the extent of her loneliness love for her babies.

And for those who know Luping as Amethyst, she is a rather huge fangirl of the Korean boy band, Super Junior. So much that she learnt (and is still learning - 반가워요!) Korean in hope of understanding what they say without subtitles and avoiding the losses in translation. She has been a fanfic writer for two years and counting, which sparked off her interest in writing and thus, this blog to practise writing so that one day, she might have the courage to apply for a (content) writer position or send in a manuscript to a publisher.

HER PASTY

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