.Saturday, May 31, 2014 ' 11:16 PM Y
& I'm waiting
31st May
There's still chance to change my specialisation.
But yes, I wouldn't know what else to do.. and this was the safest I could manage.
The choice I mean. Whether I can manage the modules, we'll see.
Time flew so quickly. It felt like it was still the beginning of May, although finals seem way distant. Maybe I forget about studies and exams a bit too fast. Results too. It felt like days ago when I got woken up by Dad's alarm clock and feeling the panic wave come over me when I thought about results. And how I was upset(?) - no idea what is the right word to describe how I felt - about my results. Perhaps disappointed.
With great expectations comes great disappointment. And so, I should just stick to my usual carefree mindless view towards results. In any case, I hope I do survive the following years. (and eww, I just got reminded of the need to plan timetable)
I finished reading New Moon today - took me 5 hours to read about 360 pages left of the book. I remembered very clearly that the first time I read the series (like 6 years ago?), New Moon was the book I liked least out of the whole series, because it was much less exciting. But it really was necessary for one to read to get all the background details. (And now I felt so repelled against writing my heart only stops for you after re-reading twilight and new moon..)
If I was Bella right now, life would be a whole lot different eh? Those fears of getting killed and losing the ones you loved, instead of wrestling with identity, future, dreams.
But somehow I felt like I settled.
I don't know how.
And I don't know if that is a good thing.
Greetings, June.
.Saturday, May 24, 2014 ' 1:58 AM Y
& I'm waiting
Thoughts
How does it feel to find something you have lost, but only realising that you will be losing it again? Especially... if it was a loved one.
And how does it feel when there's all the stress on you to act as someone very cruel, totally unlike yourself? And having your heart repeatedly thrown away, till the point you can't keep up the pretence anymore. Only at the point, you let the tears fall and the hatred shown, showing your weakness to the one that you least wanted to show.
Behind all the pretence, there lies an innocent soul that has been hurt with numerous wounds, yet she's taught to never show any weakness.
.Tuesday, May 20, 2014 ' 12:46 PM Y
& I'm waiting
520.
一年了。
不是那么适合的歌曲。但去年的今天，听着这首歌哭着与你道别了。
一听到这首歌就会想起你。
520. 我爱你. 我想你.
.Wednesday, May 14, 2014 ' 10:52 PM Y
& I'm waiting
Finals ended... and what now?
Too free to do anything?
Don't feel like doing anything...
What should I be doing?
.Sunday, May 4, 2014 ' 8:25 PM Y
& I'm waiting
四月初六
原谅我今天没去看您...
一年过得好快，因为以前不常去看您，这一年很难想象您已经离开我们身边。
除了自己一直提醒自己要想想你的样子，你看着我的那样子。
我怕有一天我会想不起来。到那时候。。你不会怪我吧？你。。怪过我吗？
希望一切都好。。请保佑家人们都平安健康。请给我力量与毅力完成这次的考试，考取好成绩。
绿萍想你了 :')
사랑합니다. 감사합니다. 죄송합니다. 용서해주세요.
THAT LADYY
` Luping
` Amethyst (Ame)
` 22
` 6H'06 FTPPS
` 104'07 204'08 302'09 402'10 NYGH
` 11S6A HCJC
` NTU
`ELF, Primadonna, F迷, JM and much more
used to be:
` Audi-addict; IcyWitchy/IcyIceWitchy/
---xAMETHYST / Amethystf
` FAM: TheRetainners; -PlayWithMe- ; xLOVEDOPESSx;
Luping is a lost child that has been seeking for her career direction since the first time someone asked her "What would you like to be when you grow up?", when she was still too tiny to reach the basin in her house. Despite reading books like What Should I Do with My Life: The True Story of People Who Answered the Ultimate Question by Po Bronson, she had been searching like a headless housefly (literally translated from 无头苍蝇) past graduation when she actually probably needed to find a job. Eventually, she found a job and a... direction.
For those who know Luping personally, she loves plushies/soft toys and is prepared to go on war with anyone who gets their hands on her babies. Her babies are personified with voices of hers and her Mummy's, and both of them enjoy framing the babies for things they obviously cannot do. When her Mummy suggested that if one day, the babies actually speak up, “那应该会吓死” (it would probably frighten one to death), she responded that she will instead “开心死” (be happy till death) if xiaofenhong (our cute, hot pink, flat bunny) replies her. That is the extent of her loneliness love for her babies.
And for those who know Luping as Amethyst, she is a rather huge fangirl of the Korean boy band, Super Junior. So much that she learnt (and is still learning - 반가워요!) Korean in hope of understanding what they say without subtitles and avoiding the losses in translation. She has been a fanfic writer for two years and counting, which sparked off her interest in writing and thus, this blog to practise writing so that one day, she might have the courage to apply for a (content) writer position or send in a manuscript to a publisher.
HER PASTY